Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
People in love make me want to vomit
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
