he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Randomize
