SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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