If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I need water and some morals
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
