We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
