Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
