Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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