Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
