I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize