craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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