Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
