absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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