Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
