I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
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