this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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