Jerry, you need to find god
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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