But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
