i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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