I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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