Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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