Dual....:-)
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
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