At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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