Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize