Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
