And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
