What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
