i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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