I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
