I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
