the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
