i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
