is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
