i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
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