Please, let me fuck your mom
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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