Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Randomize
