i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
