STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
