why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Randomize
