you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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