I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
I smell stomach acid.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
