Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
