i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
