yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
