I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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