it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
