i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Hippo gnu deer
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
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