they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
