It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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