Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
