i dedicated my morning wood to you.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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